This whole trip had us pretty well off-guard. We'd
been working hard, long hours until the last possible moment to get the
lift on and it hardly looked like we'd make it most of the time. We didn't
know where to camp, and we had no idea what to actually expect.
Even though these other problems got solved soon enough, Thursday morning
we were still two neophites in Moab for the Easter Jeep Safari and couldn't
have bought a clue with all the change in the ashtray and trade-in on the
Jeep. We felt pretty lost and off-kilter, intimidated by thousands of nicely
setup trucks surely driven by near-professional drivers, all of them. Making
matters worse I couldn't use my cell or calling card, so we couldn't hook
up with Alan Taylor, James Junkin, or Adam Zeimet (all FSJ folks).
So we putzed around trying to figure out where the EJS registration was
located for some time. Translation: I busied myself flirting with a particularly
attractive woman at the visitor center. With her excellent directions we
got registered and promptly got a bug up our butts to go off-road. No wonder,
too. All those hours collecting grease under our fingernails, scars on our
hands, and bruises all over, we wanted to see how Troubled Child did offroad!
So as I began driving, Mitch looked thru my trusty Moab maps for some trails
to try. We settled on Kane Creek Trail, rated 3+ and set off on Kane Creek
road, which soon led us to a dirt turnoff which turned out to be your basic
dirt road following a canyon wall. I was feeling less anxious about being
out there alone what with how easy this trail was. Folks, do NOT try this
at home. Wheeling alone is rather dangerous. I'm stupid, ok? I can admit
that. Not totally stupid, I guess. I mean, you couldn't drive a trail
within 30 miles of Moab without running into at least ONE other vehicle.
Still...
Just as we passed a rather steep dirt climb up a cliff we ran smack dab
into the back of a pack of 4x4s sporting matching antenna flags. Hm. Sanctioned
run? Nope. Intimidation. These guys must be hard core wheelers or something!
The first major obstacle was right ahead. A white fullsize Bronco, bone
stock, 6 cylinder, was thrashing in a dip so we got a little concerned.
Took awhile but he got out and pretty soon it was our turn. I hopped out,
picked a line, made it through clean. Whew. Gaining some confidence!
Next obstacle, an even steeper dip that the last, but feeling cocky I drove
right into it. I heard a "THUNK" and came to an immediate halt,
nose-down in the dip! Losing some confidence!
Got out. Big rock, about 1-1/2' rock wedged under
the left front spring right in front of the axle. THIS is why I carry a
hi-lift and wheel chocks. E-brake on, chocks in place, I began lifting the
truck and kicking myself. The truck was up pretty high and threatening to
roll down the incline over anything in its way. Like us for example. Remember
how I told you the crowbar is your friend in ALL situations? This is an
example. Using my friend the crowbar we began prying the rock out. In the
distance we began hearing the healthy rumble of several V8 powered trucks
approaching.
I began prying more frantically, keeping in mind that I was sitting close
to the path of the left front wheel and listening for creaks of a truck
about to give way. There was no way to drive around me here on the trail,
and I hated to be the one to keep these guys behind us from continuing along.
But good thing, we got the rock pried loose and began to move it off the
trail when the grille of a nicely set up CJ peeked over the edge of the
dip. Some odd-looking young fellows (it's a Jeep thing...?) got out, and
we told them we'd be out of their way in notime. Boy did I feel like a major
amateur! I could just hear them thinking, "stupid full size Jeep driver!"
We were rolling in no time, and
caught up with crowd ahead and the last BIG dip. No, I mean B-I-G. The white
fullsize Bronco was jammed in there tight, each bumper wedged on an entry/departure
slope, wheels barely touching earth. The nut was gunning the engine as hard
as he could, right front wagging back and forth violently as the other tire
clawed for traction. By this point we pretty well figured these guys' fancy
flags didn't really say anything special about their driving skills. Turned
out they were just a bunch of friends from Colorado. Very cool people, too!
While they strapped out the Bronco, I was airing down and yanking the quick
disconnects. I decided to pass on the dip and take the bypass. We continued
along behind the first group and the hardcore jeep group. Finally they stopped
for lunch but we felt kind of like intruders and kind of parked a ways away
like we were wary, stray dogs. I was already feeling majorly inferior, then
one of the TJ guys backed his left rear up to and then up on top of a 5'
tall boulder, keeping all his other wheels on the ground. He'd build a custom
suspension for his truck.
As we were finishing up our torts
and sandwich meat, a really mean looking Full Size Cherokee drove by--with
a "Super FSJ" sticker in the window! I had to chat. Turned out
to be Brian Riggs from the list! It helped a little to meet a fellow FSJer,
but I was still feeling totally outclassed. Well, I'd show 'em all. Mitch
and I whipped out our mini stoves and cooked up some corned beef hash. Ha,
we thought. Take that! Bet YOU guys don't have cool mini stoves.
They took off after a bit (no doubt intimidated by our superior camping
equipment) and we said we'd catch up. I decided to employ last year's Moab
lesson: fast trail driving. It's kind of fun doing 25+ in 4lo, but be careful
that you don't cause unnecessary erosion on the trail!! TREAD Lightly, you
know. We caught up with them in maybe a few minutes and followed them for
some time.
Follow the leader to the last big obstacle
Finally the trail got really rocky, inclined upwards and followed a canyon
wall curving to the right. Cliff on the right side, and a steep drop off
on the left. Way up at the top we could see someone was stuck. Yup, you
guessed it. The white bronco. Sheesh! Had to strap him out. Got his right
rear dangling between two rocks and couldn't get traction.
Hmm, thought I. Can I actually
make it up there? This is going to be some test for TC. Either embarrassment
or vindication. What's it going to be? When I got up to the obstacle(s),
it looked even worse than from below! Huge rocks and crevases, just in the
wrong place. The line had to be carefully picked. One of the guys from the
first group spotted me and I took the rig as close to the left edge drop
off as I could without piddling my pants, and cut a hard right. I made it!
Yay! Nothin' beats good spotting!
Then came the next obstacle. You head downhill, then onto some flat rocks,
then an immediate 90 degree left, then up a 20' climb of 1-2' ledges and
rocky terrain on maybe a 30 degree slope. A few trucks led the way ahead
of me, and most didn't seem to have TOO much difficulty. But one of the
ladies with them slammed her classic Bronco up these ledges in the most
terrifying way I've ever seen. We were sure that if she didn't snap a few
drivetrain components, she'd roll the truck! Those old Broncos must be pretty
darn tough! It was ugly to watch, but let me tell you, it makes for great
video!
Pretty soon I began my 20 point turn to get up
the ledge. I got a spotter to help me up most of the way. At one point I
was driving along, hoping to get some momentum built up and -- SLAMMM!!!
I stopped cold. I guess I slammed a diff or something against a rock ledge.
It was truly ugly and painful. And it didn't even make for very exciting
video, either. Oh well. What matters is that TC and I made it up.
The star of the day was Brian.
I don't think he was even awake when he drove up this gnarly incline. He
just slowly crawled his all-black Chero WT up the steps, no revving engine,
no difficulty. The 35" meats helped, but damn. It was an impressive
sight. Score 1 for the FSJs! Even the hardcore little Jeeps couldn't top
Brian's effortless run.
With all of us up, we proceded along the trail,
which now turned into a lot of flat sandy runs thru brush, with about two
dozen river crossings: steep drop offs, almost straight down for 2', across
the super-shallow streambed, and then up a 60-degree 3' climb and back onto
the trail. This got real fun, powering down the flat sections, easy drop
off, power up the inclines, rinse and repeat.
After a section of showing off their rigs, a bit later the hard core little
Jeepers decided to ford a really deep section of water along the riverbed.
By this time we were on the cb channel listening in on their chatter. Well,
the yahoo driving didn't realize he was entering a 6' drop off and he sunk
the entire engine compartment into this enormous dip. The Jeep was sticking
butt-end up with water coming over the hood. Needless to say, he stalled
and we didn't see them for some time.
As we continued out, the trail got progressively easier and finally we came
to the end. All day long the scenery was eye-popping gorgeous, typical of
Moab. Huge canyons, fascinating rock formations, beautiful vegetation, captivating
trickling streams, the everpresent red mud, and much, much more. Got pretty
cool by the time we got out, but we all had a good time and by the time
the day was done I was feeling FULLY initiated into the Easter Jeep Safari
scene, and no longer feeling any traces of inferiority. I held my own, running
with the big dogs, and TC handled himself pretty well! No mechanical failures,
got stuck once and was able to get ourselves extricated, and never needed
a strap.
We aired up, said our goodbyes, headed back to camp and had some chicken
caserole dish with tortillas followed by chocolate mousse. (I told you we
were eating like kings). James had left a note at our campsite in response
to a message we left at his hotel. So we drove over to the hotel after dinner
and viewed his video clips and jawed for awhile. We tenatively planned to
run a trail Saturday late morning. Finally we left and headed back to the
campsite.
Mitch settled down to sleep in his drafty, saggy pup tent and I settled
back into my friend's really nice REI Trail Dome tent and zipped myself
into my 20 degree mummy bag. (I'll let you guess which one of us enjoyed
a nice night's sleep...) We slowly nodded off, looking forward to the sanctioned
Gold Bar Rim trail run the next morning.
Little did we know we would find ourselves fumbling
around like idiots once again...
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